Christophany of Brandi

I have recently been thinking about the apostle Paul's encounter with Christ on the Damascus road. That was the point that everything completely changed in his life. Everything afterward was incomparably different. His worldview totally flipped and he saw everything through the lens of the Cross.

So I want to share my Christophany experience...not because I want you to know my life like that...but because I believe that the Lord has given us each other as a help. And maybe, just maybe, someone needs this story. Or maybe you just want to creep and know my life. [Note: there are easier ways to do this...i.e. talking to me, personally. hehe]

Somewhere around two years ago, I was "the happiest girl in the world". I was in a very serious relationship that I believed with all my heart was from God. (I have been thinking about that, too. How we compromise the small things and allow ourselves to slowly drift away and convince ourselves that we're actually doing God's will. hmm.) But what was really going on was jealousy, lust, manipulation, and deceit. Of course, I wasn't completely aware. Somewhere in my heart I think I knew that I was fooling myself...but I let it happen anyway. So I get deeper and deeper into this relationship...and we're serious. Planning the wedding serious. Check it...there's a facebook group called "Taylor and Brandi's Wedding." Yeah.

And then, in March of 2009, I had a real life encounter with Christ. See, I had been a Christian for close to 9 years...and I had been called to missions...but I really wasn't following through with what the Lord was intending for my life. Instead, I was trying to stuff God into my own plans and conform His ways to mine. But He rescued me. He, the Lord of the Universe, saved my life. And not that He hadn't already been my Savior but through this event, He became my Lord. The relationship with Taylor ended...not of my choice but of his.

Of course, I went through a really, really rough time in my life. I could expound about how low I got, but that wouldn't really be giving the glory to God much, would it? So, through the brokenness, Christ created a clean heart within me. I have since become a different person...because when you have a real encounter with Jesus you cannot leave unchanged. Some would see that event as a tragedy in my life...I would rebuke them! Sure, it was a heart-wrenching, soul-shaking experience - but it was one of redemption, not devastation. Everything that I once saw as desirable (a home, a comfortable life, a marriage, the American Dream), I now count as loss.

"...I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ." -Philippians 3:8

Allowing Christ to really become my Lord, to know me...and to really know Him...that makes life worth it. I may have thought that I lost everything when Taylor peaced out on me...but that was absolutely nothing compared to what Jesus is presently doing in me. Marriage, children, a home...those are all good things...but they are little compared to the life we have been given in Christ. I reflect upon that time as nothing but Divine Intervention.

Christ has already called me to the nations. I was like Jonah trying to outrun God...and God won.

To quote one of the best artists in the universe (Keith Urban):

"I shouldn't be standing here today
After all the crazy things I've done
I'm ready to fall and that's okay

I ran as far as I could run...
You won"

[The rest of the song is pretty great too if you want to check it out!]

I am so, so thankful to the Lord of all that He saw my self-destruction and my idolatry and pulled me from it. I would not be who I am today if He had not intervened. No words could ever show enough gratitude, Father. 

{Sorry, I know this was a little unorganized. Its my heart.}